なるべく考えまいとは思っていたのだが、自覚をしてしまうと途端に侘しいような気持ちにもなってくる。

Sentence Analyzer

English Translation

I had tried to avoid thinking that as much as possible but as soon as I faced it I started to feel miserable.

Furigana

なるべく考(かんが)えまいとは思(おも)っていたのだが、自覚(じかく)をしてしまうと途端(とたん)に侘(わび)しいような気持(きも)ちにもなってくる。

Romanji

Narubeku kangae mai to wa omotteita no da ga, jikaku o shiteshimau to totan ni wabishii yōna kimochi ni mo nattekuru.

Words

成るべく (なるべく)

as much as possible; wherever practicable

考える (かんがえる)

to think about; to take into consideration; to ponder; to reflect; to try to come at a conclusion; to think over (something); to intend; to decide (to do); to plan; to come up with; to devise; to scheme; to predict; to anticipate; to expect; to suspect; to doubt; to consider (somebody to be something); to look on

まい (まい)

probably isn't (doesn't, won't, etc.); don't (doesn't) intend to; intend not to; must not; (when used in an imperative sentence) don't

と (と)

if; when; and; with; particle used for quoting (with speech, thoughts, etc.); quoting particle; promoted pawn; indicates question (sentence end)

は (は)

topic marker particle; indicates contrast with another option (stated or unstated); adds emphasis

思う (おもう)

to think; to consider; to believe; to think (of doing); to plan (to do); to judge; to assess; to regard; to imagine; to suppose; to dream; to expect; to look forward to; to feel; to desire; to want; to recall; to remember

の (の)

indicates possessive; nominalizes verbs and adjectives; substitutes for "ga" in subordinate phrases; (at sentence-end, falling tone) indicates a confident conclusion; (at sentence-end) indicates emotional emphasis; (at sentence-end, rising tone) indicates question

だ (だ)

be; is; indicates past or completed action; indicates light imperative

が (が)

indicates sentence subject (occasionally object); indicates possessive (esp. in literary expressions); but; however; still; and

自覚 (じかく)

self-consciousness; self-awareness

を (を)

indicates direct object of action; indicates subject of causative expression; indicates an area traversed; indicates time (period) over which action takes place; indicates point of departure or separation of action; indicates object of desire, like, hate, etc.

為る (する)

to do; to cause to become; to make (into); to turn (into); to serve as; to act as; to work as; to wear (clothes, a facial expression, etc.); to judge as being; to view as being; to think of as; to treat as; to use as; to decide on; to choose; to be sensed (of a smell, noise, etc.); to be (in a state, condition, etc.); to be worth; to cost; to pass (of time); to elapse; verbalizing suffix (applies to nouns noted in this dictionary with the part of speech "vs"); creates a humble verb (after a noun prefixed with "o" or "go"); to be just about to; to be just starting to; to try to; to attempt to

途端 (とたん)

just (now, at the moment, etc.)

に (に)

at (place, time); in; on; during; to (direction, state); toward; into; for (purpose); because of (reason); for; with; by; from; as (i.e. in the role of); per; in; for; a (e.g. "once a month"); and; in addition to; if; although

侘しい (わびしい)

miserable; wretched; lonely; dreary; shabby; comfortless

様だ (ようだ)

(usu. at sentence-end) seeming to be; appearing to be; like; similar to; in order to (e.g. meet goal); so that; indicates hope, wish, request or mild command

気持ち (きもち)

feeling; sensation; mood; preparedness; readiness; attitude; thanks; solicitude; sympathy; just a little; somewhat; slightly

も (も)

too; also; in addition; as well; (not) either (in a negative sentence); both A and B; A as well as B; neither A nor B (in a negative sentence); even; as much as; as many as; as far as; as long as; no less than; no fewer than; even if; even though; although; in spite of; further; more; again; another; the other

成る (なる)

to become; to get; to grow; to be; to reach; to attain; to result in; to prove to be; to consist of; to be composed of; to succeed; to be complete; to change into; to be exchanged for; to play a role; to be promoted; to do ...